Working from home means that more than ever, people need ways to connect socially. To show how you can bring levity and creativity to your team, Ken Hegan hosted our first ever virtual dog show, Nikki Costello led a yoga and movement session, and Laura Barron held a guided meditation.

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From the Furry Furst Fur-tual Dog Show:

Erin Cooper:

Hey, welcome to everyone. I’m Erin from NOBL. I’m joined by our illustrious host, Ken Hegan here. He is the one in the dapper cap. Ken is an award-winning and award-losing comedy writer and filmmaker. He’s a senior copywriter for all your copywriting needs. Shameless plug. Thanks for putting that into the script, Ken. Importantly, Ken loves dogs. Take it away, Ken.

Ken Hegan:

I do. Hello, everyone. Hello, cute dogs. Welcome to the world’s first virtual dog show. It’s the world’s first virtual dog show that we’ve ever seen, at least, in our 20 seconds of Googling. Joining me is my color commentator Rex, the porcelain dog. Rex has some very strong opinions about what makes a great dog. So, we’ll be conferring as part of the judging this morning. What a stoic game face?

Also joining me is little Sasha. Hey, Sasha. It looks like the dog on the tin of food that you buy, that you’ve probably got a thousand tins in your cupboard now. The whole point of this morning is that we’re celebrating our free buddies who are helping you work remotely this month. We’ve seen Arnold Schwarzenegger’s mini horses. Now, it’s time for your dogs to shine.

So, here’s how it’s going to work out. Over the next half an hour, we’re going to rank up the 10 super cute fur babies and categories like pretty paws and, of course, how they shine on camera. Now, it’s time for your dogs to shine. So prizes will include… Now, yeah, you think you’re just doing this for fun? No. You’re going to get a 2020 dog calendar. Only, partially, you use it so far. It’s still eight good months in there if all goes well.Speaker 201:36You could also win, your dog, I should say, could also win the world of dogs on DVD, glorious widescreen DVD. As good as it gets with a pretty cute dog there. Now, that’s on VHS, VCR not included. The truth about cats and dogs, of course. I thought I’ll throw in something special from my mom’s bookshelf. It’s The Bartender Standard Manual. I’m sure we can all use that at this time.

So, there’s going to be a four-prize categories, including the overall winning dog for Best in Show will be featured in a special Doggy Foti photoshoot. So, this doggy photo shoot will be all about celebrating your champion dog. Essentially, it’s going to be screen grabs from this session because I’m not going anywhere near your house right now.Speaker 202:28Erin, you had one thoughts about the Q&A?

Erin Cooper:

Yes. If you are not yet one of our featured pet owners, please use the Q&A at the bottom of your screen to let us know that you have a dog. If we have time, we will be able to feature your dog as well in the dog show and enter it into the running for the esteemed prizes, including the priceless dog calendar.

Ken Hegan:

Okay. So let’s start the world’s first virtual dog show. I’m going to give you a… If you’re interested in having good dog featured on screen, I’m going to give you two minutes right now to go fetch your dog, bring them back on camera. We’re picking the first 10 dogs. So let’s begin. Our first dog is Kik. Tell us about Kik, Erin.

Erin Cooper:

Yes. Well, Ken, Kik is a two-year old female dog who goes by she and her. Although Kik does believe that gender is a construct.

Ken Hegan:

All right, I understand. It says here that Kik is a mixed breed. That’s a “total shit mix.” A proud heritage. Let’s talk with Kik’s owner Margaret. Margaret, can you tell me about Kik’s personality?

Margaret Gray:

Kik is a really good girl. Sometimes she can be a bad girl. So, she likes to go by good girl, bad girl. She has two major talents. One is finding stuff that smells to roll in, and two is sending mixed messages because she likes to play hard to get.

Ken Hegan:

Those were all very important skills during an apocalypse, Margaret. Now, I understand Kik is also the fastest dog in the world. Is that correct?

Margaret Gray:

Yeah, absolute fastest. She’s in the Guinness book of world records. They can’t actually come and measure us right now because of what’s going on, but it’s presumptive that she’s one.

Ken Hegan:

All right. We can pretty much make up our own bios at this point in history, can’t we?

Margaret Gray:

Yeah.

Ken Hegan:

She likes to chew a bone. Is that right? She likes to work a bone?

Margaret Gray:

Yeah. She has a daytime bones and then nighttime bones, as we all do. So the nighttime bone is just for right before bed, and then she puts it back, comes back to it the next night. Then she has her daytime bones. She really likes her routines.

Ken Hegan:

Okay. Does Kik love or hate it when you’re working from home?

Margaret Gray:

Kik knows nothing else. So, I’m very lucky to work from home a lot of the time. So, if I even do go into the office, she gets to go with me. So she doesn’t know a world where I’m not working with her 24/7. So, she’s also a very lucky dog, I think.

Ken Hegan:

I understand. She has a trick. It says here, something about hitting the mute button.

Margaret Gray:

I can hit the mute button for when she’s barking at stuff that’s happening across the street. So, it’s more like she’s trained me how to hit that mute button really quick.

Ken Hegan:

Very good. Very good. All right. Let’s have a look at Kik’s paws, please. Can you please present-

Erin Cooper:

Yeah. Can we see the tops and bottoms of Kik’s paws. If you can bring them close, so we can judge? It’s very interesting.

Margaret Gray:

She’s not like that interested in going because she’s seriously private, but [inaudible 00:05:29] bottoms, too.

Erin Cooper:

Yeah.

Ken Hegan:

Has Kik signed a release, Erin?

Erin Cooper:

Kik has not signed a release. Kik’s lawyers are still looking it over. I anticipate we should have a bash by the end of this session.

Ken Hegan:

All right. Now, let’s see how well Kik shines on camera. I’d like to see the coat in all its glory, if the best lighting you can give us here please.

Margaret Gray:

Get together into some sunshine here. Beautiful place.

Ken Hegan:

Okay. A little closer please. I’d like to see the other side. I want to see the flow of the fur.

Erin Cooper:

Yeah. Okay. Interesting.

Margaret Gray:

All going [inaudible 00:06:09].

Ken Hegan:

Yeah. As a bald man, I appreciate that flow. That’s good flow. Yeah. Some irregularities there though. It’s not quite the gleaming 200 times a day brushing, that glos that I expect. Thank you, Kik. I’m going to randomly give you 8.7. 8.7. That’s a good dog. All right.

Margaret Gray:

Thank you.

Ken Hegan:

It would have been lower, but you are very brave to go first. Moving on. Our second dog is Jack, a six-year-old mix of American mastiff and Catahoula Leopard Dog would sound made up.

Simon Hardy:

It sounds very exhausting, doesn’t it? But it is true, that we were assured by the SPCA.

Erin Cooper:

Yes. Actually, a Catahoula Leopard Dog, if you’re not familiar, for any of the audience members or not, they are known for being great with children, but intolerant and aggressive with other dogs and strangers. So, maybe similar to some previous girlfriends or partners.

Ken Hegan:

That’s a useful skill right now actually. A bit of social distancing, not a bad thing.

Simon Hardy:

Well, we live on the side of a mountain and a gala of bears. So, the dog plays with the kids and also keeps the bears away. So, when he sees a bearer, just go running after the bear and chase it back off into the woods. So, he does two jobs. He’s pretty useful.

Ken Hegan:

That’s nice. I would’ve liked to have seen that from Kik. I think that would’ve made Kik a perfect all around 10, but, nice. These are good skills. I understand Jack is super chilled. Is that right?

Simon Hardy:

Very chilled. He reflects our behavior. He hates the rain. So, when you don’t want to walk him in the rain, he’s totally cool with that. He’ll just go off and do what it needs to do and come back. Then, when it’s sunny, he’s desperate to go out. So yeah, he’s perfect from that point of view as well.

Ken Hegan:

Can you please show us the paws as you tell us what other skills Jack got?

Simon Hardy:

Well, [crosstalk 00:08:02]. He’s very relaxed because he’s had his breakfast, and he’s waiting for a walk, but he’s just got quite big feet.

Erin Cooper:

It does. It’s almost comatose.

Simon Hardy:

I’ll give some of my toast. That would wake him up a bit.

Erin Cooper:

Not sure.

Ken Hegan:

Rex here appreciates a comatose dog. I understand there’s some other skills, something about dried fish. Is that right?

Simon Hardy:

Dried fish. Yeah, well, basically anything, if you hold it as far as you can. Sometimes, I get the kids to stand on a chair often as high as they can and hold it way up in the air and drop things and he can catch them and eat them every single time. Well, even in the dark. We’ve tried all kinds of ways, but yeah, he’s very good at that.

Ken Hegan:

Well, I can’t do that. That’s good. Something else about… Let’s see, you send him some notes about remote working. Does Jack like to remote work?

Simon Hardy:

Yes. So, I’ve got my offices at home and it’s also the warmest room in the house, selfishly. Jack will then spend the day, especially in the winter, will just come and lie at my feet all day. He farted a little bit, but that’s just part of working from home. I think it bonds us as well, keeps us together.

Ken Hegan:

You can’t stay on a conference call when your dog’s barking.

Simon Hardy:

No. It can be somewhat difficult at times, especially around with a client. You’re so stuck in his smell, and you can’t show it.

Ken Hegan:

So, you’re wincing as you say, “I love this work. I love this work.”

Simon Hardy:

Exactly, yeah. Yeah.

Ken Hegan:

Yeah. Great job. All right. Now, I don’t know about your big fancy English competition, Simon. But here in North America, we dock points for farting.

Can we see the coat, please?

Simon Hardy:

Yeah. Give me stand up. Up. Up again, come on.

Erin Cooper:

That dog is asleep.

Simon Hardy:

Come on up. Now, he’s got a nice stripy chest.

Ken Hegan:

Yeah. Asymmetrical pattern there.

Simon Hardy:

Now, the other thing is because he’s a mastiff mix, he always looks really miserable because he’s kind of has eyebrows that are tilted up in the middle, which is a constant source of amusement because even when he’s really happy, he looks so sad. Look at him now.

Ken Hegan:

He’s barely alive comatose. He farts and he always looks miserable.

Simon Hardy:

Yeah. To me that’s the perfect dog.

Erin Cooper:

Yes.

Ken Hegan:

Well, a gorgeous dog. It’s the envy of this household. I think either Rex or Sasha here would love to hang out with your dog. I am not seeing pure bread perfection here, but of course-

Simon Hardy:

No, definitely not.

Ken Hegan:

… healthy mix. I would like to see consistent sheen in a steady gaze to show he’s interested in video conferencing. I’m going to give, okay, let’s see. My heart says 10, but I think he gets a seven for now. He needs some work on the farting. But thank you about that.

Erin Cooper:

Maybe we can investigate some diet options. I’ll send you a followup, Simon, on some low-scent foods.

Simon Hardy:

Probably less Marmite, I’d imagine.

Erin Cooper:

That could be the culprit. All right. Okay.

Ken Hegan:

Thank you, Simon. Thank you, Jack.

Simon Hardy:

Got it.

Ken Hegan:

Next up?

Erin Cooper:

Yeah, next up, we have Grissom.

Ken Hegan:

Grissom.

Erin Cooper:

Grissom is a 14-year-old pug with Lesley as Grissom’s handler/owner. Hello, Lesley.

Lesley Mirza:

Hello. Welcome from our home.

Ken Hegan:

Really? You’re at home

Lesley Mirza:

Indeed, yes.

Ken Hegan:

Tell me about Grissom.

Lesley Mirza:

Grissom has dressed up for you. He has a bow tie on.

Ken Hegan:

Man, that’s almost cheating. That’s fantastic.

Lesley Mirza:

That’s good.

Ken Hegan:

Grissom is named after the CSI character. Is that correct?

Lesley Mirza:

You are so correct. That’s exactly who he is after, yeah.

Ken Hegan:

Is that because a Grissom likes bugs, pug,?

Lesley Mirza:

No, because he’s an introvert, and he doesn’t really like talking to people.

Ken Hegan:

Very good. Okay. So, what’s Grissom like. Let’s say the personality?

Lesley Mirza:

Well, he likes food. If we want him to do anything, we must give him snacks constantly. Other than that, he’s a please just leave me the hell alone. Yeah, if you go to pat him, he goes, “Please don’t,” as you can see.

Lesley Mirza:

Please don’t.

Ken Hegan:

That’s like me at the grocery store yesterday. Just no touching please. Now-

Lesley Mirza:

I can understand that, yes.

Ken Hegan:

I understand he thinks he’s hot.

Lesley Mirza:

He thinks he is the hottest thing than sliced bread. I mean basically, he goes out in is huggy-buggy because he can’t walk very well. He looks around like he is the king. He owns that huggy-buggy, and he doesn’t want to come out of it. He just sits there, looks around at all the plebs around.

Ken Hegan:

Does he like to shake a paw?

Lesley Mirza:

Well, let’s try. We’ll see. He’s very stubborn. There we go. We can force them into it, as he eats my fingers.

Ken Hegan:

A forcible paw shaking. I don’t know. I don’t know. I’ve got to dock you probably 0.25 points for that. I like an eager paw or at least an eager elbow bump.

Lesley Mirza:

Come on.

Ken Hegan:

Now, where does Grissom sit, while you’re working at home or your husband’s working from home, what’s the sitting situation?

Lesley Mirza:

Well, I try and have him sit with me on the sofa whilst I’m watching a plethora of TV series, but he goes and sits in the office with my husband. He sits in his bed and then barks at him and has tantrums when he’s not getting food.

Ken Hegan:

Grissom sits in your husband’s bed or your husband sits in Grissom’s bed?

Lesley Mirza:

That is a good question. Maybe it’s both.

Ken Hegan:

It’s both, okay.

Lesley Mirza:

Grissom sits in his own bed on the floor and interrupts my husband’s conference calls by having hissy fits because he’s not getting snacks.

Ken Hegan:

So, you would say he’s a useless homeworker companion is what you’re saying.

Lesley Mirza:

He is, but he’s very cute. I think you should get 10 points for the cuteness.

Ken Hegan:

All right, let’s see those paws please.

Lesley Mirza:

They are the most delicious paws you’ve ever seen. Grissom?

Ken Hegan:

We should’ve had a delicious paws category.

Erin Cooper:

Mm-hmm (affirmative).

Lesley Mirza:

Look at that paw.

Erin Cooper:

Wow.

Ken Hegan:

Yeah.

Lesley Mirza:

Look at it. It’s a perfect paw. It really is. Then how cute is that? Look at that.

Erin Cooper:

Wow! That is-

Ken Hegan:

I like that pad pattern.

Erin Cooper:

Yeah. Very good. Very natural.

Lesley Mirza:

I know.

Ken Hegan:

Nice play.

Erin Cooper:

Yeah. Excellent. I bet it was.

Lesley Mirza:

Look at that fur. It’s soft. It’s fluffy. It got a bath before we went into staying at home time.

Ken Hegan:

Easing. That’s almost of it. That’s a cheat code right there.

Lesley Mirza:

That was great.

Ken Hegan:

Okay. Cute dog for sure. Let’s see now. I’m going to give… I like Grissom.

Erin Cooper:

Oh my goodness.

Lesley Mirza:

Wow!

Ken Hegan:

I know. I know.

Erin Cooper:

This is an unprecedented score.

Ken Hegan:

We’ve never had a score this high.

Erin Cooper:

We will be independently verifying these scores later on, folks, just to make sure.

Ken Hegan:

Our next cute dog, please.

Erin Cooper:

Yes. Okay. Our next cute dog. I’m very excited about this one because this is actually the youngest dog in the competition. We’ve got Brew. Brew’s handler is called Kaylin. Now, Brew is a 10-week-old mini bernedoodle, ho goes by he, him, his. Tell us more about… What’s a bernedoodle?

Ken Hegan:

Are people just making up dog names at this time [crosstalk 00:15:36]?

Kaylin Aarts:

Yeah, basically. Can you hear me okay?

Ken Hegan:

Oh, yes.

Erin Cooper:

We can.

Kaylin Aarts:

So, a bernedoodle is a mix of a Bernese Mountain Dog and a poodle. In his case, a mini poodle. So, he will be medium-sized, about 30 to 40 pounds. But right now, he’s quite small. He’s low puppy.

Erin Cooper:

Ken, I’m not sure that that’s a real dog. It does look like a stuffed animal.

Kaylin Aarts:

Yeah.

Ken Hegan:

Yeah. We’ve had a couple of stuffed animals snuck into this competition. I understand it’s also known as the Bernese Mountain Poo. Is that correct?

Kaylin Aarts:

Yeah. We don’t prefer that name.

Ken Hegan:

No. No. Roll out the tongue.

Kaylin Aarts:

Yeah, it’s also referred to as a designer dog, but he’s like more low key than that. I would call them more like a T.J. Maxx [inaudible 00:16:23] versus like designer. He likes a good deal.

Ken Hegan:

Okay. I hate to inform you, but according to the Internet, Erin, they’re not bred to take home ribbons and dog shows, [inaudible 00:16:36].

Kaylin Aarts:

They are also not recognized by the dog associations.

Ken Hegan:

What?

Kaylin Aarts:

It’s new. It’s new.

Erin Cooper:

Oh, my god!

Ken Hegan:

We have a rogue a dog here. I think he’s one of a kind.

Erin Cooper:

We need to practice tolerance here, people. You’ve really gotten to the core of some of the old, old policies that we are trying to break through, especially today.

Kaylin Aarts:

Indeed.

Erin Cooper:

Well, thank you, Kaylin. I appreciate that.

Kaylin Aarts:

Yes.

Ken Hegan:

Okay. Well, Brew, no one expects you to win anything today, but we love you. Now, I understand Brew has two modes right now. One-

Kaylin Aarts:

Yeah. So, he’s in what we call beast mode when he’s just very active and just popping all over the place and

Ken Hegan:

So, that’s beast mode? Is that beast mode already?

Kaylin Aarts:

No, this will be the other mode, which is pretty much comatose, but he’s very, very snugly and very lovey and likes to hang out.

Ken Hegan:

All right. Can we have a closer-

Kaylin Aarts:

Real, I promise.

Ken Hegan:

Can we have a closer look at those paws, bring them right into the camera please?

Kaylin Aarts:

Yeah. They’re so pink. They’ve barely seen the world yet.

Ken Hegan:

That is an indoor dog.

Kaylin Aarts:

They’re fresh. He’s not indoor, but he’s been quarantined since he was alive pretty much.

Ken Hegan:

Yeah. I’m not seeing that sandpaper quality that I’d like to see in a working dog. I’m seeing some comments here. People are suggesting their own dogs would get a 10 plus like that. People trying to sneak in and get some fast votes.

Erin Cooper:

That’s very fast.

Ken Hegan:

Well, of course, just 10 weeks, I expect cute paws like this. Let’s see Brew’s coat.

Kaylin Aarts:

I’m going to pick him up with some treats.

Ken Hegan:

Yeah. Wow! That dog is 99% liquid. Just-

Kaylin Aarts:

He’s a lot of fluff.

Ken Hegan:

Okay. That’s a good tongue. Well, we forgot to ask about tongues from the other dogs. My apologies to the other contestants. If you weren’t holding onto your dog, would it sprint for daylight?

Kaylin Aarts:

No, he’s real tired. This is pretty much-

Ken Hegan:

Well, yeah. 2,000 plus viewers. That’s a lot of pressure. All right. I’ve seen enough. Let’s see now. I’m going to give, let’s see, randomly assign… I’m going to go 7.5, that’s a beautiful dog you’ve got there. Thank you very much.

Kaylin Aarts:

All right, thank you. [crosstalk 00:19:12].

Erin Cooper:

Ken, we have an audience member who would like to show their dog. If you’re okay with it, I think we have time to promote them.

Ken Hegan:

Yes, please. Now, we have to be fast because we have, what? Two other dogs, right?

Erin Cooper:

I don’t think we do. I feel like this is where we’re at right now.

Ken Hegan:

Well, fantastic.

Erin Cooper:

We have a couple of dog no-shows. Dogs can be unpredictable, but-

Ken Hegan:

Let’s have the fresh dog.

Erin Cooper:

Yeah. Let’s have a fresh dog. So, we’ve got Karilen. I hope I’m saying your name right. Karilen, if you will-

Karilen M:

Hi, everyone.

Erin Cooper:

Yeah. Turn on your camera.

Karilen M:

Yeah, I have old technology, so it should be showing.

Erin Cooper:

Oh, here we go. Yes.

Karilen M:

I have a five-and-a-half-year-old puppy, Labrador Retriever named Livi, live the lab. You can follow her on Instagram, L-I-V-I, Livi the lab. That’s not promo. She probably doesn’t care, but she brings joy to everyone. So I just created that social account for her. Her main job is eating. She likes to vacuum cleaner the streets when she’s not sleeping and snoring through.

Ken Hegan:

Oh, there we go. Can I have a closer look at that dog please?

Karilen M:

She’s a real dog.

Ken Hegan:

Yeah. We really should be testing for that, the real dog in front of those stuff.

Erin Cooper:

Yeah. Can you see the dog breathing, Ken?

Ken Hegan:

I see a bear, I think. No, I see a fake… There we go.

Karilen M:

Liv, say hi.

Ken Hegan:

Could you hold a mirror up to that dog’s mouth?

Karilen M:

Say, hi! She’s so tired of all the words.

Erin Cooper:

Yes!

Karilen M:

Very tired.

Ken Hegan:

From this angle, that looks like one big really weird looking dog. Okay, I see. It’s one dog in the right, and

Karilen M:

Livi, say hi. She’s very focused. So, she’s got a lot of capacity.

Ken Hegan:

Focused? Are you talking about yourself and your own skills or your-

Karilen M:

You must be a dog.

Erin Cooper:

Human. Yes. Amazing. Amazing.

Ken Hegan:

Okay. Any tricks? I know you talked about vacuuming the streets, eating all the food. Anything else, anything that’s going to make, make your dog stand out? I mean, Simon’s Jack, he can catch fish from four feet standing on a chair.

Karilen M:

Yeah. The bar’s pretty high with this crowd, but she’ll go home with anybody who has a nice voice That’s probably a good one.

Ken Hegan:

Yeah, that’s really valuable.

Karilen M:

Or if they had food on them, then she would get those all cleaned up immediately.

Ken Hegan:

Okay. Can I have a closeup on the coat please before I make a final judging here?

Karilen M:

Okay, Liv, let’s show you off. Sorry, I’m not used to this setup guys. Oh, so soft! Yeah, but-

Ken Hegan:

I just want to jump through that screen and use your dog as a pillow. Would that’d be all right?

Erin Cooper:

Yeah. Me, too.

Ken Hegan:

Yeah.

Karilen M:

She would allow it until she groans and goes to her own space in my bedroom

Ken Hegan:

That’s fair. Okay. Okay, beautiful. Erin, some quick thoughts? It’s almost time to do our judging.

Erin Cooper:

Yeah, I am. I would love to see if we have one minute for Stephanie after this, but very calm. I feel like temperament. I would give 10 out of 10, although I’m not sure that dog can walk. That’s usually a requirement for..

Ken Hegan:

Yes, for most dog shows, but this time of year and with the way we’re going, dogs don’t need to walk.

Erin Cooper:

True. Okay. Yeah, I’ll leave it to you.

Ken Hegan:

I’m going to give your dog a, let’s see now, 8.35.

Erin Cooper:

Oh, wow.

Ken Hegan:

Yeah, that’s a good dog. I’m really starting to reconsider my earlier… I want to boost the numbers on some of our earlier contestants.

Erin Cooper:

Yeah.

Karilen M:

She thanks you.

Erin Cooper:

Yeah.

Ken Hegan:

Yeah, oh, good. No, Margaret’s dog, I’m really starting to rethink. That’s a cute one. Erin, we’ve got to start. Is Stephanie ready to join?

Erin Cooper:

Yeah, I think so. Let’s see here. Yep. Here we go. Stephanie? Stephanie, hello. Will you unmute yourself, and let’s see your dog? We’ll do a quick lightning round on this one.

Stephanie:

Start video?

Erin Cooper:

Yes, please.

Stephanie:

There we go.

Erin Cooper:

So, what’s your dog? Oh, wow.

Stephanie:

Okay, come here. He only behaves with treats.

Erin Cooper:

Okay.

Ken Hegan:

They’re the same. Same here.

Stephanie:

I’ve been trying-

Erin Cooper:

What do we have here?

Stephanie:

… trying this whole time to give him some treats to get him to behave. There’s Thor.

Ken Hegan:

Thor!

Erin Cooper:

Thor!

Stephanie:

Say hi.

Ken Hegan:

So, you’re saying you’re the only dog owner here to have brought the God of Thunder this morning.

Stephanie:

The what?

Ken Hegan:

The God of Thunder, Thor.

Stephanie:

Yes, of course. Yes. Yes. Think that he is the God of Thunder.

Ken Hegan:

What are his skills?

Stephanie:

Well, when I have a treat on hand, he can sit nice. He can shake a paw. Take the other paw. Come on. No, I don’t want it. Come on, let’s go. He’s totally interested in the treat. He can give me dog kisses. Come on, dog kisses.

Ken Hegan:

What impressed of dogs could shake their back paws. I want to see that in the future virtual dog show.

Stephanie:

Share your back paw. Here we go.

Ken Hegan:

We’ll put up with it. There you go. All right. Now, tell me. He thinks he’s the king and behaves like a baby. Is that right? Did you say that?

Stephanie:

He totally thinks he’s a king. Look at his bed. He’s got the king bed there. He totally behaves like a baby. He whines all the time. He wants my attention 24/7. If we’re out for a walk, and there’s something hard for him to overcome, I have to pick him up and prop them over the log or whatever. Yeah. He’s full of… He’s the worst dog ever.

Ken Hegan:

He sounds like a terror on legs. I’m really glad we got… Is he good at working from home?

Stephanie:

Well, yeah! He loves when I work from home. He’s absolutely completely useless. It doesn’t help at all. He barks whenever somebody comes to the door. I have conference calls all the time, and I got to wrangle him in the background because he’d make a noise. Come, on.

Ken Hegan:

All right.

Erin Cooper:

All right, Ken, we’re going to have to wrap up. Okay.

Ken Hegan:

My heart says 6.99. My head says 10. All right. Thank you, Stephanie. Thank you, Thor.

Erin Cooper:

Amazing.

Stephanie:

Thank you.

Ken Hegan:

That’s one cute, little pooch. It’s time to do the award. So, everyone, please have your dogs ready to attention. I’ve already been conferring here with Rex. Sasha has taken off, so she’s not going to be voting. Our first prize is for prettiest paws, for best paw clad claws and attractiveness. You’ll get a free dog calendar, as mentioned. The winner goes to, who is the one with the cute little paws? Lesley’s dog. Lesley’s dog.

Erin Cooper:

Grissom.

Ken Hegan:

Grissom. Congratulations, Grissom.

Erin Cooper:

Grissom. Great. Congratulations, Grissom. All right, we have 30 seconds to award the rest of the winners.

Ken Hegan:

Okay. So, VHS tapes go to best shine on screen. Where are the best shine on screen goes to? Who do you think? I’d go with the Karilen’s dog. Karilen’s dog—nice gift.

Stephanie:

That’s enough treat.

Erin Cooper:

Oh, my goodness.

Ken Hegan:

You’re getting good… Congratulations!

Karilen M:

Yey, thank you.

Ken Hegan:

All right. Best home buddy. The dog that best represents the perfect pal to get you through the day when you’re working from home. I’m going to-

Erin Cooper:

I don’t know. That first one, Ken. That first one.

Ken Hegan:

Yeah. First one. Congratulations. The first one is… It wasn’t Jack, was it?

Erin Cooper:

No. It was-

Ken Hegan:

No, it was Margaret’s dog.

Erin Cooper:

It was Kik, the working from home dog.

Ken Hegan:

Kik. Congratulations.

Margaret Gray:

Thank you.

Ken Hegan:

Well done, Kik. Overall best in show, Erin? Turn off their mics for a second. What do you think? Best in show?

Erin Cooper:

I don’t know. I really don’t know, Ken. It’s very hard. I like those sleeping dogs. I like the comatose ones quite a bit. That puppy though is pretty cute, and it’s alive. We know now. It’s up to you. I’m going to have to defer to Rex.

Ken Hegan:

t’s the puppy. Congratulations.

Erin Cooper:

Yeah!

Ken Hegan:

You’ve won best in show, the Bernedoodle Mountain Poo.

Kaylin Aarts:

Yeah, we win.

Erin Cooper:

Thanks, everyone.

Ken Hegan:

Yes. You wonderful, wonderful creatures, thank you so much.

Erin Cooper:

Take care, everyone.

Kaylin Aarts:

Thanks.

Ken Hegan:

This is the world’s first, but not the last virtual dog show. I’m Ken Hegan.

Erin Cooper:

Take care.

Ken Hegan:

Enjoy the weekend.

Kaylin Aarts:

Bye.

Margaret Gray:

Bye.

Erin Cooper:

Thanks, everyone.